thats what she said

how is it that a win-stay-in game between two teams with legitimate super bowl chances can be decided by such an unfair overtime system? how is it that a refereeing crew with a track record for calling more penalties than any other crew gets to do a wild card game, much less oversee an overtime where a questionable call can literally be the difference between a win and a loss?

i'm not saying the penalties weren't legitimate or whatever. i don't want to get into that. but i wish the nfl would realize they're blowing it with sudden death. at the very least turn this into a scoring marathon like college does. something where both offenses and both defenses are tested so that we know it's equal. hell the game show 'password' has figured out how to achieve equality with celebrity participants with collective IQ's of Joey Porter's jersey number. i don't see why the nfl can't do the same.

also, Darren Sproles should stay in san diego. so i can get that jersey.

Category: NFL

Funny story about my picks for the NFC East: they were pretty far off.

Whatever.

UPDATE NUMBER TWO

In the spirit of updating prospects for the Thighnal Four, I stumbled across another gem that *must* be included in the sports side of the bracket, Miss Ines Sainz--the Erin Andrews of the South. As in, Mexico.

Go ahead, Google accordingly.

UPDATE NUMBER THREE

Football playoff race!

NFC Projections:

New York beats Philly and Carolina. Loses to Dallas and Minnesota. Finish 13-3, Bye&Home Field Advantage.

Tampa beats Atlanta, San Diego, Oakland. Loses to Carolina. Finish 12-4, Bye.

Minnesota beats Lions, Falcons, Giants. Loses to Cardinals. Finish 10-6, In.

Cardinals beat St. Losers, Vikings, Seahawks. Lose to Patriots. Finish 10-6, In.

Dallas beats Pittsburgh, New York, and Baltimore. Loses to Philly. Finish 11-5, In.

Carolina beats Tampa, Denver. Loses to New York, Saints. Finish 11-5, In.

OUT:

Washington beats Cincinatti, Philly, San Fran. Loses to Baltimore. Finish 10-6

Saints beat Bears, Falcons, Panthers, Lions. Finish 10-6

Atlanta beats the St. Losers. Loses to New Orleans, Tampa, Minnesota. Finish 9-7

Chicago beats Jaguars, Texans. Lose to Saints, Packers. Finish 8-8

Green Bay beats Bears, Texans, Jaguars. Lose to Lions [surprise!] Finish 8-8

UPDATE NUMBER THREE:

Plaxico Burress, you are a Snarf! We all know why, I'm not even going to go into detail. Amazing, some receivers do dumber things than Ocho Cinco.

Category: General

Ok, sorry this is late, I just got back in town and our guests picks weren't in before I left.  Guest this week is Sev's roommate, Robert.   Since we all chose the Giants, I also gave our guest the benefit of the doubt that he really didn't think Washington had a chance against the champs either.  So we'll just count it as a win for everyone instead of being nonexistent.

Current Standings:

Loki: 0            ASU: 0            KU:0              Guest:0

This week's picks

Loki:  Giants, Saints, Eagles, Steelers, Jets, Patriots, Bengals, Lions, Seahawks, Jaguars, Cowboys, Chargers, Cardinals, Colts, Vikings, Broncos

ASU: Giants, Saints, Eagles, Steelers, Jets, Patriots, Bengals, Lions, Bills, Jaguars, Cowboys, Chargers, Cardinals, Colts, Packers, Broncos

KU: Giants, Bucs, Eagles, Steelers, Jets, Patriots, Ravens, Lions, Seahawks, Jaguars, Cowboys, Chargers, Cardinals, Colts Vikings, Broncos

Guest: Giants, Saints, Eagles, Texans, Jets, Patriots, Bengals, Lions, Bills, Titans, Cowboys, Chargers, Cardinals, Colts, Vikings, Raiders

In future posts a "last week's points" section will also be added.

with this season coming up, and my fantasy drafts over, one of which i would really like to just forget about immediately, i've decided it's about time for a new post on here. and what better way to get this season kicked off than by posting my predictions for the division about which i care most [and, coincidentally, the best division in the nfl by far]: the nfc east.

dallas is the clear favorite here, and is absolutely loaded with playmakers in all facets of the game. a resurgent philly, a relatively unscathed offseason for the super bowl champion Giants [a rarity these days], and a relatively unknown force in the Redskins make this an intriguing race. so i'll break it down real quickly by the game for all four teams, looking at the schedules sort of in a knee-jerk fashion without looking TOO deeply in the individual matchups [injuries will change this landscape before the season's a third over, anyway]

DALLAS: 12-4 (4-2)

the Cowboys join the redskins as teams with a week ten bye [and play in week eleven against each other in DC] in this division. i feel relatively safe asserting that their schedule is the second most difficult of the teams in this division to only new york; it includes road games at cleveland right away, green bay [an underrated team coming into this year by most], arizona [my pick to take the nfc west], and at pittsburgh in december. i like dallas to take all the home games against division opponents this year, and lose to philly week seventeen and washington week eleven. i actually expect them to open the season strongly and would not be surprised at all with a 5-0 start. those of you checking the schedule would notice that would have me NOT surprised to see them get beat by arizona. as far as the non division games are concerned, i think the toughest one is against pittsburgh on paper, but i expect dallas to win that thanks in part to having played a thanksgiving day game and getting extra time off. the games that concern me as a dallas fan are, in order of scare-factor: the seattle game, which is on thanksgiving and thus represents a short week of preparation; the arizona game, because that game screams "shootout" to me and i wouldn't really be surprised to see either team standing at the end; the cleveland game, because it's just hard to tell how good the Browns will be this year based off the preseason results, and they will have no problem stretching our secondary; and the green bay game, because if rodgers looked good against us last year without reps, there's always that chance he'll look good again. if i had to pick a game on this schedule that dallas should win handily but could lose, it'd be st louis--IF they can avoid injuries that long. but when the dust settles, i don't see any team in the nfc east sweeping dallas, meaning i think their spot at #1 is pretty safe. 4-2 seems likely--i like their chances of sweeping the giants, of all teams.

PHILLY: 9-7 (3-3)

i like philly's improvements--a lot--but i don't see any other team in this division that they can sweep. you'd think the redskins are looking pretty weak right now, but philly has to travel to washington for the game at the tail end of the year [week sixteen] and that will be a short week for philly coming off MNF. i like the redskins towards the end of the season to get everything together like they always seem to just before it's too late. the skins have the personnel to really get after the Eagles' defense despite Asante Samuel's overrated presence, and they just might have pieced together a game plan to slow down westbrook juust enough by now. that said, they've got an easier schedule than the giants do, with the only truly intimidating nonconference game the one at seattle [i think they drop that one for sure]. expect some bumps in the road for the eagles, especially since they could very likely start off 1-2 after playing at dallas and pittsburgh. after their bye week, they get a freebie against Matt Ryan, but then have to face seattle, the giants, and the Bengals in a tough defensive threesome. if they win two of those three, i'd be surprised [and scared, because donovan will have to be the donovan of old to pull that off]. all told, i think philly splits all the division opponents, maybe pulls off a surprise win here or there [at cincy or at seattle seem the best bets], and blows some close games they really should have won. this is a playoff team this year, i have no doubt about that.

WASHINGTON: 9-7 (3-3)

SURPRISE! the skins have got a shot at this, if for no other reason than i legitimately believe they will get the same fortune they got last year and a chance to knock off dallas week eleven. this pick is contingent upon a few things: first is zorn's ability to rebound from what is going to unquestionably be one ridiculously tough start [honestly, i'm picking the skins to start 0-5, and that is NOT a stretch by any means--three away games at the giants, cowboys, and philly, and two homes against the Saints and Cardinals. ouch]. second is that i really like their matchups in the games following that, with the Rams and browns coming to DC and the Lions on the road. probably more important is my belief that they can squeeze out a victory against the Steelers the week before their bye. if this happens, i don't see them losing at home against the cowboys. this damn team just has a knack for getting momentum in time to beat the boys, and i'm gonna go ahead and hand them that. from there, the schedule is just insanely easier than the hellish first five weeks; likely losses at seattle and at cincy don't matter if they uphold their end of the bargain and run the home game schedule against the rest of the nfc east. they get to close out the season against san francisco, which is always a nice little bonus [do not watch that game, i guarantee it will be boring]. the most important factor for the skins is that they will get better as the season goes along, and they get all their home games against nfc east opponents in the second half of the year. i like campbell to turn it on towards the end of the year [even if i wouldn't touch Santana Moss with a ten foot long pole in fantasy football].

NEW YORK: 9-7 (2-4)

i know, i know. many of you are looking at this and thinking "he's just putting them down here because he hates them." FALSE. first, i hate all the other teams in this division not containing Marion Barber iii. second, they don't have osi now. and third, their offense is pretty weak. eli is the third best qb in this division AT BEST, and i don't think he'll be even that by the end of the season. their runningback situation is the weakest in the division. Plaxico Burress, though it worked out allright for him last year, is a weekly injury concern--and they don't have much behind him, receiver wise. Kevin Boss got very few looks even when they didn't use shockey towards the end of last year, and he's not a game-changer; tyree made one of the coolest catches ever, but he should really just retire on a good note now because he's not going anywhere else; and they have the wrong Steve Smith catching balls. their defense is arguably the worst now that osi is down, and that same defense had new england-esque fortune in their ascent towards the end of last year. you can't deny their great decisions, but a little bit of it is suspect considering they zigged frequently when the other teams thought they would zag. if that evens out this season, which it will [it always does over an entire season], then this team will get swept by another team in the division [dallas, likely] and be left in the dust. unlike dallas, they won't win at pitt; i expect them to enter the bye week four with AT LEAST one, if not two losses [yeah, keep an eye out for that new and improved rams defense, mr. manning] and they won't get a chance to regroup after that. unfortunately, they come off a bye to face seattle and cleveland. they also have to travel to the desert to face arizona, and they finish the season with a sure loss at minnesota. yeah, this is the toughest schedule in the division. and that's why they won't reach the playoffs.

taryne mowatt, contrary to popular belief, is not the only individual with the "taryne factor"

this groundbreaking development, the second of two thus far in my study on the taryne factor, or tf for short [any coinciding puns off abbreviations are wholly inadvertent, by the way,] came along slowly as i observed nastia liukin's badass performance in the women's all around competition.

now i have to confess that this is not the first time i watched women's gymnastics as an actual...well....fan. as much as my inner man would like me to keep this to myself, it's important that i note that i have in fact watched gymnastics--and nastia and shawn in particular--previously. it might have happened instead of watching a particularly boring san francisco/baltimore football game [don't even act surprised--there are baltimore and san francisco fans that turned the dial during this one, too. i guarandamntee it]. the point is, i've seen enough of it to know that nastia was the huge favorite coming in and that if she could nail the vault she would probably steal the gold. while everyone else was crying about scoring [including nbc's announcers] i was busy confessing my sins to that guy up there in the hopes that he wouldn't screw over nastia liukin, and right in the middle of that process, i caught myself.

see, i don't do this other than dallas cowboys game days and duke blue devils basketball games. not even on lacrosse game days, or braves game days, or royals/white sox game days. there are two entites that i reserve the beautiful sacrament of reconciliation for, and its the cowboys and the blue devils.

well, and that other time i was watching taryne mowatt in the college world series not this past year, but the year before that.

so now you know where i saw the correlation--though it took a couple hours to remember it, because after i finished bonding with g-money, [and making fun of the chinese seven year old competition with the skier,] i spent the next hour or so engaging in my signature celebration. but EVENTUALLY, i realized that i had unconsciously elevated nastia liukin to taryne mowatt's level.

i went ahead and shared this with my correspondents and said some things i will probably be reminded of until i'm 40, but i can live with that. asu made an effort to get to the bottom of why nastia made this jump in my standings ["it's because she's blonde! it's because she's wearing pink! it's because she's flexible!"] and ku just could not get over how, um, awkward some of my explanations ended up. the point, though, is that this is not like the tucker max five-star scale on how attractive women are. neither taryne nor nastia are legit five stars, though taryne might be pushing it on a good day. that's not the point though. this is more than that. this is just the taryne factor. when you actually watch enough of a women's sport to kind of care about it or at least reach a level of respect for what they're doing, and when they dominate, that's like a force multiplier on the tucker scale. a massive force multiplier. so that's the taryne factor.

future findings will be shared as such.

OLYMPIC CRITICISMS:

also, whoever does the makeup for nbc's correspondents on the softball diamond should be shot. and alex flanagan should replace bob costas. nothing against costas, but i really think flanagan should be on tv, like, all the time. then i could decide whether she overcomes erin andrews in my book. these questions are vital for the thighnal four, which of course TWSS will cover in depth this upcoming march. don't sleep!